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Should my Stepmother handle my wedding or my Mother?

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Mothers, Stepmothers [My Stepmother], we all need them. But when a mother turns her back on her children due to either the faults of her own, or external influences of her family or other factors unknown to her children, it becomes imperative that someone (a stepmother, in this case) needs to step into her role and help these children become the best they are meant to be.

A young Lady aged 26 years narrates her present predicaments, and seeks to get the answers to her questions from you and other well-meaning people. Let’s hear her.

This is a story I wish to call: The Greatest Love of My Stepmother

“My father is 56 years old, my stepmother is 51 years old, while my runaway mother is 54 years. I love my Step Mother very much because she has been there to me and have seen me through my formative years as a woman.

I grew up without my mother, my stepmother brought me and my siblings up. My father said my mother left him when he had nothing. The stories behind my mother’s going was too much. My father said my mother was too demanding and self-centred. So when he lost his job, my mother ran away to their place leaving my father with us, because my mother was from a wealthy background.

The issue is that my mother’s parents never agreed to my mum’s marriage to my daddy, so when my mum got pregnant, they had to marry her out in order not to bring shame to the family.

Even when we go to my grandparents place, we are being treated like gold diggers and outcasts but we still try to feel at home.

So my father feeling so helpless with me and my two brothers decided to remarry and my stepmother trained me from 5 -18 years before my mother returned from wherever she went to.

She came with quarrels, and her parents backing her up, and my father being a quiet man gave her a flat to stay.

My Stepmother, my Bedrock

My stepmother was the back bone behind my father’s wealth. My stepmother’s brother gave my father some 1.5 Million Naira to start up a business, so from there my father pick up and started flourishing.

Since my runaway mother came back, it’s been fighting, quarrels. She hits my father with sticks, saying he couldn’t wait for her to return home and jumped to another woman. She tried to poison our minds to hate my stepmother but I and my brother never listened to her.

l am about getting married because I am 26 years old now and am pregnant too, l love my stepmother so so much and l want her to handle my marriage arrangements and come for my omugwo (looking after the other and the baby after delivery).

My mother never gave me that love and peace l want from a mother. My stepmother knew when l started seeing my period and she gave me Good sex education that l need. She trained me in school.

Since my mother came back, all she does is gossip about my stepmother saying she is a witch that has eaten her children in her womb and has now bewitched us, and she fights my father. My stepmother has no child, so she took us as her children.

Have l taken a wrong step in my decisions please, your friends should help me out.

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  • I would make the same decision if I were in your shoes

  • The Love of a Mother is so great. But when fate (whether Good or BAD) separates the mother from her children, and a Stepmother steps in to do a much better Job, she should be allowed to enjoy the beauty of her job.

    Your choice is very much OK and supported. If your mother cannot bring herself to behave properly even when she was accepted back in the house, then she is really asking for her exit from all your plans.

    Goo on and make yourself happy, Its your day, and no one can stop you from enjoying it.

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